do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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