Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize