O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
