Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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