my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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