I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
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