I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
