She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
