How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
