I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize