well I can't set my house on fire every night
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
