somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
