We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
