I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize