How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
