my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
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