I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
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