physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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