STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
