Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
