he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
