Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
