So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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