I'm eating all of the evidence.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
