sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
