We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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