Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
