For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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