Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
