he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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