these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
