I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
