hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
