This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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