I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
