You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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