omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
So here I am, sexting at work.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
