I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
