Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
