Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize