It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize