Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
