Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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