I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
