Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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