paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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