That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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