i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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