Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
