everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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